SOLITUDE OFTEN CAN be dismissed as a spiritual luxury or afterthought. But as I’ve grown in ministry and activism, I have become convinced that solitude is a spiritual necessity.
I found myself spiritually depleted this past summer, carrying the weight of dismay and uncertainty associated with the election, anxiety and stress tied to the responsibilities of leading Sojourners in this season, and so much more. I debated whether to take some of my sabbatical. (Sojourners employees receive a one-month sabbatical after every seven years of employment.) My soul desperately needed it, but I kept pushing it off due to the tyranny of the urgent. I finally committed to a plan for August.
I’m beyond grateful for a vacation with my family, followed by a five-day silent retreat at Prince of Peace Abbey, a Benedictine monastery north of San Diego. My soul needed this spiritual reset. I joined in the daily spiritual rhythms and services of this monastic community, which emphasizes praying psalms and meditative reading of scripture and other sacred texts. My favorite was the 8 p.m. compline service, which asks for God’s blessing before you go to sleep: “Before the ending of the day, Creator of the world, we pray, that with thy wonted favor, thou wouldst be our guard and keeper now.”
Prayer and liturgy five times a day was centering — and challenging. I learned that silence is hard. It can be disarming and disorienting. But silence also can be rejuvenating and transformative. Shutting out the noise of social media and television was freeing. This precious time of reflection, prayer, and contemplation powerfully reminded me how essential spiritual discipline is to our discernment and formation, and how important it is to, as the great mystic Howard Thurman describes it, “center down” in communion and conversation with God.
Above the abbey’s entrance are the words “Seek God.” It felt providential that the gospel reading during the first Mass was Matthew 6:33, “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and God’s righteousness, and all things will be added unto you.” During the retreat, I realized a key source of my desolation was that I had been pursuing meaning, affirmation, and reassurance far too much in the things of this world. It took days of silent reflection, undistracted prayer, and uninterrupted time with God and myself to recenter my foremost desire and commitment to seek God’s kingdom, allowing everything else to flow from that desire, even if in ways I can’t fully predict or control.
One guide during the retreat was Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, by Ruth Haley Barton. She writes:
“On retreat there is time and space to attend to what is real in my own life — to celebrate the joys, grieve the losses, shed tears, sit with the questions, feel my anger, attend to my loneliness — and allow God to be with me in those places. These are not times for problem-solving or fixing, because not everything can be fixed or solved. On retreat we rest in God and wait on [God] to do what is needed. Eventually we return to the battle with fresh energy and keener insight.”
My hope and prayer are that you too will be able to prioritize and experience some form of solitude that recenters and enlivens your faith for the kingdom-building work ahead.
Rev. Adam Russell Taylor is president of Sojourners and author of A More Perfect Union: A New Vision for Building the Beloved Community. Follow him on Bluesky @revadamtaylor.
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