Mallory Ortberg: The Bible Teaches Little Girls They Can Drive Spikes Into the Heads of Generals

By the Web Editors 4-19-2016
Image via Rachel Marie Stone.

"Look, say what you will about Christianity, but the Bible teaches little girls that they can grow up to drive spikes into the heads of Canaanite generals, and there’s huge value in that. Cause there’s sometimes that really goofy straightforward talk about what you can do, or not, 'cause the Bible women.' And I really like kind of playing with that and going 'Fine, then the lesson I got from this is that you can drive spikes in people’s heads.'

Click to listen along:"I don’t remember who it was now that wrote this, but I loved that someone talked about in the New Testament, for about an hour and a half, the entire church was Mary Magdalene. In between when she goes to the tomb and when she has to go find the disciples, she's the entire church. And I love that. I love that for an hour and a half, a woman was the church. I think that's really wonderful."

Read our full interview with Toast editor Mallory Ortberg here.

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