Aug 7, 2015
One of my social media friends is fed up with being called privileged. Yes, he’s a white, middle class male who hasn’t faced much discrimination in his life. But he sure doesn’t feel like he’s living a privileged life.
He’s got kids in college and he works lots of overtime but still has barely enough to pay the bills. Nobody drives him to work in a limo. He can’t get a reservation at a fancy restaurant – couldn’t afford it, even if he could. There’s no such thing as an annual bonus in his household. No stock options. Golden parachute? He wishes.
As for his background, his family had to stretch the food budget when he was growing up – they ate a lot of mashed potatoes because they were cheap and filling. He was taught to be hard-working, committed to his family, dedicated to his job.
He tries to be all of those things. And he is all of those things.
But privileged? He sure doesn’t feel privileged.
I understand his point exactly.
In my experience, a lot of us think of privilege in terms of wealth or power or people who are way above us. We think of the CEO pulling in million-dollar bonuses, or the political power brokers who cut deals, or the famous families that endow programs at top universities. We think of the ones who hire expensive lawyers to get off when they do something wrong.
Yeah, those people are privileged. But us?
Yes, us.
There are two sides to privilege. One involves getting special treatment — that part’s pretty obvious. The other part involves avoiding the many obstacles that others face in order to have the same chance as us.
To use an analogy: If you get to start the race way ahead of the other runners, then you are privileged. But by the same measure, if you start at the same place but others have hurdles in their lane while yours is clear, then you are privileged as well.
Think of it this way:
— If you’ve never been denied a position or a promotion because of your sex, then you’re more privileged than others.
— If you’ve never run into opposition when you wanted to build a place of worship, then you’re more privileged than others.
— If nobody looks at you suspiciously because of the color of your skin, then you’re more privileged than others.
— If nobody refuses to serve you because of your sexual preference, then you’re more privileged than others.
— If nobody tells you that your religion is evil and must be eradicated, then you’re more privileged than others.
— If nobody scolds you that you’d be doing much better if you weren’t so darn lazy, then you’re more privileged than others.
If you don’t face the same discrimination as others, then you are more privileged than them. I'm sure you can add many other examples.
Now, it’s true that you didn’t ask for this privilege — in many instances, you were simply born with it. And there’s no reason to feel guilty about it.
Don’t beat yourself up over it. Instead, work to change it so that others are treated the same as you. It’s not about pulling ourselves out of the race, but removing the hurdles from the others’ lanes. It’s about taking responsibility to remove privilege from our societies.
That is what we’re talking about when we talk about privilege.
To the extent that we’re indifferent to our privilege, we perpetuate it. To the extent that we refuse to help remove the hurdles from others’ lives, then we expand it.
If we say that we’ve somehow earned our privilege or that others deserve to be treated in a lesser way, then we’ve become poisoned by our privilege. If we say that there are no major obstacles for others — they don’t face racism, sexism, homophobia, religious hatred — then we’ve become the face of privilege.
Two thousand years ago, a Jewish rabbi took aim on privilege. His life was a radical challenge to the concept that it’s okay for some people to be treated better than others. He said it’s definitely not okay for those who have enough to ignore those who don’t.
He saw everyone as an equally beloved child of God. And he said we absolutely must treat each other that way. No privilege allowed.
He had no patience with injustice. He challenged those who were indifferent. He sparred with those who felt that they deserved some measure of privilege because they had worked hard and followed the rules. Those who have the most, he said, are expected to give the most.
He talked about doing away with privilege entirely.
He said we should share everything we have with those who have less. We must become advocates for those are treated as less-privileged people — the ones facing all those hurdles that we don’t face on a daily basis.
We need to invite those who are less privileged over to our house for a meal, and then seat them at the head of the table and treat them with the importance that they deserve but rarely get.
He called that the way of God’s world. A place where privilege is replaced by compassion, and love embraces everyone equally. Where there is no such thing as privilege because we are all equally privileged.
And we each must work to make it that way.
Joe Kay is the associate minister at Nexus United Church of Christ, Butler County, Ohio. He also writes a weekly blog at https://joekay617.wordpress.com. His email address is listed on the blog, in case you care to contact him directly.
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